I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
