I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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