is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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