I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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