I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
