i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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