I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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