Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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