Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
