after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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