She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
