This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
