Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
