so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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