The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
