maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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