Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
foreskin is a definite game changer
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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