at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
