oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
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