that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Randomize
