I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Please, let me fuck your mom
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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