just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize