i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
