Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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