just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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