ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
