So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize