a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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