better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Randomize
