I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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