im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Randomize
