woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
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