i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
