I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
