i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
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Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
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i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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