At least make sure they are 18
Why
your room smells of hookers.
And success
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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