She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
sex in a hospital.. check
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Randomize
