I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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