I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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