Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
