dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
