Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
