I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Randomize
