Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
