I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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