she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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