do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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