Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
