Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Randomize