I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Blood and glitter go together right?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
we should paint friendship bongs
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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