Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
